Pastor's Corner to Help You in Your Daily Life.

Let us praise God, who chose us and marked us as his children even before we were born. 

I thank God for your faith. I pray that you may continue to know God and God’s will, and that you may come to know the power of God at work in your life.

We were separated from God, wandering about and following the course of this world. We listened to what those around us said and succumbed to our base impulses and instincts. We weren’t happy. But our God is rich in mercy, and made us alive in Christ. We have been shown enormous kindness by God in our lives. God has given us the gift of grace and mercy.

Let us remember this, how we were once separated from God’s love. We were walking in darkness and had no hope. But this strange faith, from an ancient and faraway people in Israel, was opened up to the world and given to us. We have been brought into God’s great drama of love and redemption for the world in Christ. Can you believe that?

Christ is our peace. God’s love in Christ melts away the hostilities we once had for one another and brings us together in peace. What was once two is now one. God’s love in Christ enables our dividing walls to be broken down. We may see each other as strangers and aliens, but now in God’s love we can become one. We are woven together by the love of God in Christ.

This is why I pour out all of myself into this ministry with you: I have experienced this wonderful, life-transforming grace and love that melted away my own bitterness, anger and disillusionment. Somehow, I can’t believe how God called me for this wonderful work – me who is least deserving of it. But through God’s grace, I am called to share and lead others into this real, amazing new life in God’s love.

I pray that this love may dwell in your heart too, and that you may come to understand the depths of this great love that God has for you and this world.

For those of us who know this love, let us lead a life worthy of this new life to which we are called. Let us be humble and gentle with one another. Let us have patience and bear with one another in love (especially our weakness), and let us make every effort to maintain unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. There is one body, one Spirit, one hope, one Lord, one faith – all given by our loving God.

We have each been given our gifts to contribute to the peace of this world. Let us use them to build a community and world of peace. Let us not be like children, swayed easily by other opinions, drawn by crafty rhetoric. Let us speak the truth in love and build each other up in love.

We must no longer live as we used to. That was a dark and ignorant existence. We were simply reactive and following the whims of our desires. We are called for something different! Let us put that old way behind us and be renewed in the spirit of our minds and build up new selves in the likeness of God.

Let us learn to serve one another in love, instead of seeking dominance over the other. To do this, we must be strong in God’s love and power. Let us not be naive about the powers of this world. We are too weak to withstand it on our own. There are truly dark forces we must contend with in this world. Let us take up the armour of God to withstand the onslaught of division, acrimony, hate and malicious judgment. Let us be beholden to truth, right living and words of peace. 

Let us pray at all times and bring our cries to God. Please pray for me and the pastoral staff as well, as we constantly seek to discern God’s will and equip God’s people.

Peace be with you and the whole community during these unsettling and unpeaceful times. Grace be with you, you who has an undying love for Christ. 

Amen.

Does this letter sound familiar at all? It’s my own wording to you of Paul’s epistle to the Ephesians (read of it on your own if you have time!)

We are a spiritual community rooted in God’s Word. The truth of God’s Word is ever needed in a world plagued by division, animosity and expedience. Let us commit ourselves to deepening our faith and spirituality rooted in God’s truth.

Please join me in praying for the United States. Today, we sit on the edge of our seats and hold our collective breaths as we see whom Americans will choose to lead their country.

The world awaits, because the tenor and decisions of that country affect the world.

For the immediate short term, I pray for peace to prevail. There is a lot of fear of violence and unrest that may arise, regardless of who is elected. May people be safe from harm, and may calmness prevail over anger.

For the longer term, regardless of who is elected, there is so much healing that needs to take place. Divisions have become hardened, and anxieties have been exacerbated. 

This makes me reflect on what we do and why we exist as a church. What is the most concrete outcome of who we are as a faith community? The most concrete outcome is learning to live in harmony with other human beings. Just like our theme for this year states (“Becoming Together”). 

Even if someone offends me, hurts me, or is very different from me, I still see that person as my brother or sister, or at least as a human being worthy of dignity. That person doesn’t need to think like I do, do what I do, or behave in the way I expect. I still see that person as an individual worthy of respect and dignified treatment.

Getting to that concrete outcome requires a deeply rooted spirituality. A spirituality that cultivates the best of our humanity and is aware of our real shortcomings. A spirituality that does not succumb to our shortcomings, but one that allows God to bring out the best of our spirits. Through the teachings, life, death and resurrection of Jesus; through the truth and insights that come from our engagement with Scripture; through the power of the Spirit, we cultivate the humanity that was created in the image of God, and affirm that imago Dei in others.

Therefore, let us pray. And let us commit ourselves to the continual journey of our spiritual growth, so that we can be the salt of the earth and light of the world.

Sincerely,
Simon

Ps. I tested negative for COVID-19. Thank you for your thoughts and prayers. Please download the COVID app!

This post is part of a series on "Faith Formation for Families". The text below is a talk given by Kathy Hwang on how she has made decisions about technology for her families. For the accompanying talk about technology's impact on faith and spirituality, see the post: "What's Tech Got To With it?"

By Kathy Hwang

When Pastor Simon asked me to speak to give advice, I was truly humbled because as a parent you always wonder if you are raising them right, whatever right is.  Later, I realized what did I agree to as public speaking is not my thing even though my children would say otherwise,  and neither is writing but I had to write since I have a difficult time focusing.  The children’s advice to me is “pretend you are giving us a speech mommy because you can go on and on”.  

I am a single mother of four amazing children, amazing because others have often told me how amazing they are and that I did a great job.  Bianca is my eldest daughter who is 18 years old, followed by Chloe who is 16 years old, then Naomi who is 13 years old and finally Olivier who is 11 years old. 

I have always been drawn to articles and documentaries that I can learn from.  I remember one article about a boy who’s parents took away his gaming and killed himself and how much the parents regretted giving it to him in the first place, another documentary on the alarming rate of breast cancer in young women in their 20s, coincidentally in the same spot they carry their phone, another one on the dangers of texting and driving, another on mental illness, another on those who have created these devices send their children to tech free schools, etc.  There is so much information out there about the negative impacts of electronics but for some reason we don’t think it applies to us until the problems come knocking at your door.  I don’t know about you, but I don’t need another problem in my life.  

Limiting technology in these times is very challenging.  The children’s father and I have very different views on technology so I have to work with those differences to limit the children’s exposure.  Also, each child is different and as a parent you have to adjust to those differences.  Then there is the social pressure which I am sure all of you are aware of.  As an adult, I have a difficult time regulating my tech usage so how can you expect children to regulate themselves to such an addictive device.  

High school is a challenging time for any teen and parent especially since technology is the norm and teens are going through so much change while trying to fit into their world.  When the children started high school, all their friends were getting cell phones, but my girls were still bringing their big iPads to school.  Then their father bought Bianca and Chloe used cell phones.  I let them keep their devices to use with no functions so they used it like a really nice iPod mainly for music.  I used their cell phones for my parenting advantage and would find any excuse to take their phones away.  I could see Chloe cherished her phone more than Bianca so Chloe got her device taken away very often.  Even though she was upset with me, I could see the change in her demeanour right away from being phone free.  Chloe is doing much better limiting her use but it is still an issue from time to time especially when I learn more or I am reminded of how bad it really is.

I started watching the Social Dilemma last night and told the children I may further reduce their access, it did not go over well and we are still in the negotiation stage.  

It seems children have cell phones younger and younger now.  Recently, Naomi in grade 8 got access to a cell phone.  Every one in her class except one boy has a cell phone so I caved in and let her use it with restrictions.  I let her take it to school but as soon as she comes home at 4:30 pm she has to put it in a bucket in my room and is not allowed to have it until the next day when she goes to school.  She already lost her phone for a week for a minor infraction but now knows that I am very serious about my rule.  I still question myself as to whether I should let her keep the phone.  

There are four of them, now three since Bianca went off to Western to manage and it is not always easy to remember what rule applies to who but they know.  Two of them are very responsible at following the rules.  The other one had to lose her phone numerous times to understand the rules.  The more common rules that I remember are all devices have to be in my room by 9 pm and no devices on Sunday.  I have a desktop in the living room where everyone can see the screen if any of the children need to do their homework on Sunday.

My son has his own set of rules and right now he has lost all privileges to any electronics.  I was reminded last night that I said it was for one month but I thought I said forever.  Olivier has access to many of his sister’s devices and often when he is quiet he is on a device.  After watching him for a couple of weeks, I realized how occupied he was with getting on a device as soon as he got up.  At 11 years old, he does not even need to be on a computer so I took away everything and put a password on every single device.  As a toddler, I could his unhealthy attraction towards the Wii.  At his father’s house he has the PS4 and he keeps asking me to buy the PS4 for my house since he is mostly with me.  It is so hard not caving into your children’s demands especially since all the other kids seem to have it, but that guilt will pass.

Children do not need to be busy all the time.  It is ok if your child looks bored, it is normal and actually good for them.  They need quiet time with no distraction so they can use their imagination.  During the summers, I make my children go to their room for an hour for alone time without any access to technology.  It is harder as they got older especially my eldest at 18 years old but they appreciated the alone time rule knowing they would get an hour break from one of their annoying siblings.  

During the school year, the children are allowed tv only from Friday to Sunday only after they have done all of their chores.  They are use to not watching tv.  To keep my children away from electronics I also put them in a lot of activities from piano, gymnastics, karate, soccer, etc.  With homework, chores around the house, activities, practicing piano the children don’t even have time for electronics.   

To prepare Bianca for university, I caved into the social pressures and got Bianca a phone with unlimited talking and texting and 1.5 GB of data.  She was so happy to finally get a phone with access to its intended functions.  I reminded her that I am not there to regulate her usage and I hope she uses it wisely and remembers what I taught her.  She told me that she was grateful that I didn’t let her have it before.

Every child is different so you have to be creative and adaptable to their different stages in life.  When they were much younger I allowed them as much electronic time as they would read and they would not read more than an hour.  Also, the children have to see parents following their own rules to some degree.  It ultimately starts with parents.

Thank you for taking the time to listen.  I hope as parents you understand it is in your children’s best interest to limit technology.  It is ok to go against the norm and it is ok to change the rules as often as you need to.  It is normal to make mistakes and you will make many but keep talking to your children even if they look like they don’t want to, they do.  Life get busy but as a parent you need to be your children’s safe place and they need to know they matter so they don’t search elsewhere.  I sat for hours trying to get some of them to talk.  Once they know you are truly there to listen, they are quicker to tell you what is bothering them.  Being a parent is the hardest and the most important job you will ever have and the most rewarding.  As amazing as my children are, they are still connected to technology and its negative impacts so it is imperative to keep communicating and reinforcing the positives.  Delay as much as possible giving them free access to electronics at least until high school, then set boundaries.  It is easier to give access little by little than take away once they are use to having it.

This post is the first of a series on "Faith Formation for Families". To read the accompanying talk given by Kathy Hwang, please see: "One mom's experience with technology." 

This is a stressful time for many parents. I pray that peace be with you during this time.

I know that during the pandemic and lock-down, many of us were juggling so many things at home. Out of necessity, one of the easiest ways to manage our kids was to let them watch tv or go on their devices. That’s understandable.

The role of technology really started to come to mind as I reflected more deeply on the faith and spirituality of our families: parents and children. I will explain the relation of those things in a moment.

But let me start by sharing what I think is at stake here. What’s at stake? Our very lives.

Or at least, the quality of our lives.

Our physical existence may not be in as much of a question in an abundant country like Canada, but what kind of lives will we live?

What kind and quality of life will our children live? I believe these are the things at stake.

In our faith, we start with the premise that life is a gift. In fact, the greatest gift. Our lives are meant to be experienced and lived as a gift.

In Galatians, St. Paul says this:

“The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness,  gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against such things.”

Galatians 5:22-23

To me, this is the fruit of the good life. 

Most of us say that we want our kids to just be happy. I believe that if we have these things, then we live a good and happy life. 

More than career, money or all those circumstantial things, if we live with these qualities, then we are living a good and happy life.

The thing is, this good life doesn’t just happen. This kind of good life is cultivated.

Like a plant, it must be tended, nurtured and grown with care.

What must be cultivated is attention.

• Attention to the world around them.
• Attention to the world within them.
• Curiosity to these things: nature, people, their feelings, their thoughts.
• Questions that arise from paying attention.

It is through this kind of attention that we begin to access the reality of God, who is not known through the senses, but through the subtle things we notice when we pay attention.

But here is the problem: our attention is being stolen. And technology has been a huge culprit.

I admit that I am a part of this problem.

I am addicted to checking my emails on my phone. I start jonesing when I’m away from my phone or don’t check it for too long. 

Before the pandemic, I tried hard not to have my phone on me when I was around the kids at home. A short while into the lockdown, I didn’t care, and now I find myself checking my phone all the time.

Our attention is being diverted by the dopamine hits we get from our tech. That is the premise of the documentary, “The Social Dilemma”.

Deeply rooted spirituality that bears the fruit of the Spirit cannot be cultivated when our attention is taken away. It just can’t happen. It will not form with superficial and occasion attempts.

It’s like working out. One workout will not build up your body. It takes a consistent routine.

What we think is what we are.

Drilling down a bit more, where we give our attention to is who we are.

Do we have ownership of our attention, or is our attention in bondage to others?

St. Paul says this in Romans:

“Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your minds, so that you may discern what is the will of God—what is good and acceptable and perfect.”

Romans 12:2

Our minds – our attention – is at the root of a deep spiritual life that leads to the good life. 

Knowing God begins with an awareness of the ineffable – that which is incapable of being described by words.

This awareness of that which cannot be described by words leads to sense of awe and wonder. That is the beginning of any knowledge of God. That wonder leads to questions and curiosity. 

These are things that happen only we give our attention to these things.

So what’s tech got to do with it? I believe a lot.

When our attention is being robbed, our access to the divine is robbed. Our access to the deeper richness of life – the good life – is robbed.

Jesus came into a context where people were suffering under a harsh system in which religious, political, economic and social forces made life very harsh and oppressive. He came to restore life and dignity. He came to free people from the bondage they experienced.

St. Paul preached about freedom from the values that prevailed in a Roman context that valued power, wealth and might. 

I wonder if our calling for this context is to find freedom from the enslavement of our attention – of our minds – so that we might regain our humanity and restore life.

St. Paul says this in Philippians:

Our task is to think about these things. To liberate our minds. And we do this together as a spiritual community.

So today, I just wanted to give a little diagnosis of our situation and get us thinking about this.

Next week we will delve more into how we can cultivate this kind of spirituality that leads to those fruit of the Spirit – the fruit of the good life.