2019 ESM Retreat – Interns Post Retreat Reflection

What was the planning experience like?

The planning experience was really good! There were a lot of things we had to do, but in the end I think that it all went well. It was a lot of fun to be behind the scenes. Although some aspects of the planning was stressful, I think everyone helped out a lot. I was even talking to Veronica about this, and she said that because we helped plan the retreat, she didn’t have to do as much work as she would have normally done. She would ask if she had to do certain tasks, but we already completed them. It was a good feeling to know that we were able to take some weight off other people’s shoulders. – April Chia

 

 

The planning experience was very busy. I don’t know how this was done before by a smaller team, respects. I think it was a really good experience because we got to serve our church. When we found out who was coming and who our groups were, I got really excited to be planning because I knew who we were doing these things for. I think that one of the reasons this job is so unique and special is that we are serving people we really care about. Overall, it was a really fun and satisfying experience, and I think I learned a lot about my own skills as well. – Sarah Choe

What was the experience like of being a co-leader for your group?

The experience was super refreshing, I’ve always been a leader/co-leader for groups of people that are similar in age to me. But this experience was a whole different ball game. The age may have been intimidating at first but I quickly realized that adults are just the same as us, just older and wiser. There’s not too much that really differentiates us other than life experience. Once I realized that adults aren’t too different facilitating discussion and encouraging others to participate was a breeze. This is definitely something that I would be open to doing again. I learned so much from others and their life experiences, and I learn about others from my community that I never would have talked to otherwise. The experience was great, I learned a lot and discovered a lot, I would totally do it again. – Joel Chung

This was definitely a new experience for me as I have never taken a leadership role within the church, so building up to the retreat I was a bit nervous. However, once the group discussions started it went pretty well. I am very thankful for the opportunity to have led a group with so many great, kind people and to have been able to co-lead with a few of them. It really took any pressure off and I came to the realization that leading discussions doesn’t necessarily mean that you are the only one talking. It’s still essentially just a conversation between a group of people.

Looking back at my group and its dynamics from a leader’s perspective is also a lot different from just a member. When being a leader you have to take into consideration how other people think and what you can do to ensure that a safe, inviting, and comforting environment is created for everyone to share. I know that I can be quite hesitant to share in group settings, however after this experience I have a greater appreciation for leaders who know how to encourage people to talk and develop the type of setting that makes people want to share without necessarily calling them out, which is a very difficult thing to do. – Elisabeth Jong

 

What meaningful things did you learn and experience at the retreat?

Something meaningful I learned and experienced at the retreat was the story of how the people in my group came to become members of our church, and their overall personal faith journeys and life struggles. Before sharing, I didn’t really know if I was going to share deep personal stories, but when I saw others in my group sharing those kind of stories and struggles first, it really made me see just how open, and how much trust they have in myself and the other members of my group, making me feel really happy and warm inside. Telling people my own personal life struggles and stories, and hearing their words of encouragement or even just their attentive listening made me realize just how blessed I am to have a community of people who truly care for one another. Learning about other people’s faith journey, and hearing the struggles they went through were very similar to the struggles I faced made me realize, many people go through the same slumps and hardships within their faith journey, but it’s okay and it’s nothing to be ashamed of. Overall, my whole experience at this years ESM Retreat, was a meaningful experience to me. – Monica Park

Since we were co-leaders for our groups, we were able to talk and really get to know the adults on a different level that we’ve never experienced before. I learned a lot about their stories, and I got to know them in a way I never would’ve expected to. Something about sharing our own faith stories with others really brings us closer to them before we even realize it, and I truly feel that this happened in our group discussions. I think I learned on a very deep level that everyone really is, struggling so much, and it’s heartbreaking to see as a community member, but it gives me hope knowing that as one body we can also help each other through any struggles we may be facing. We first just have to be aware of them. I think this was the most meaningful things I learned at the retreat. How precious our community is that we can share our struggles and our burdens, and help each other through them. –  Jocelyn Chung

How has this whole experience shaped your view of the church?

I think this retreat has allowed me to realize how much of a community our church is, and how welcoming and accepting the people can be. I used to find the older people, such as the adults, very difficult, thinking that these people were very different from me, people that I would never have anything in common with. I was wrong when I realized how easily I was able to talk to these people and how they were just people like I was, except with more life experience! This ESM Retreat was really eye opening for me as it was my first time being in a group discussion with the adults, and I think it really changed my view of the adults in our church. – Hannah Lee

I think St. Timothy is such an interesting place. We have so many people with so many different walks of life coming together for God. Ultimately, we are bound together not only because we are Korean, but because of God. I mean I will be completely honest, I still think religion can be a bit stuffy however I do believe in the morals and values that it teaches. I still have my doubts but seeing these adults with their own very real problems and how they struggle with it, brings a smile on my face. I don’t have the conviction to believe God with all of my heart, I’m still questioning and doubting but I do hope that one day, my faith can be made real. – Joshua Chung

What could have been improved, or what suggestions do you have to make things better for the next retreat?

Although I really enjoyed the retreat, I think there are a few things that could be improved to make things better for the next retreat. One thing is for the group leaders to be more prepared beforehand. I think it would’ve been beneficial to do more training together prior to the retreat. With Session 2, I had a hard time leading because I didn’t know the story of Abraham as much as I knew the story of Jacob. So, if we do something similar in the future, I think it would be beneficial to get assigned the character our group is to break down, and then to do prior reading and dissection. A lot of people know the Bible but they don’t really know it in depth, and I think a lot of the group leaders struggled with creating discussion, as it was unfamiliar. I had a hard time contributing to the conversation too because I wasn’t sure what to say. For my group as well, I think it was the discussion that was the hardest to carry, and we had a lot of silence during that time. The adult co-leaders also relied a lot on the interns to lead discussions throughout the retreat, and I think if that’s the case in the future, the interns should receive more training as well. It would also help for the leaders to get a general overview of each session beforehand, so we are more prepared and have questions in mind prior to discussions starting. – Lauren Lee

Although group sharing was great, I feel like there could have been a time allocated to just sitting down and talking with group members about their stories of faith. There were times when we would have to cut discussion short because we would have to move on to the next activity. Conversation between adults are always flowing, and we should have time allotted to just talk about the lives of our group members. – Torrance Yoon